You thought I wasn’t looking
Its been a rollercoaster few weeks getting everything ready for the UK run. To say the least it has been a bit of a surprise that it’s all suddenly come together, but the opportunity was there and if you don’t act on it you going to regret it for ever.
As a family it’s been difficult as we have just got our lives back together after the India journey, for the first time in years I had all my children together in one place, what a day to just quietly sit and look at how they have grown and how they have evolved and to me the pride to see what they have achieved – it makes me proud.But here I go again hitting the road, but this is a shorter journey and I know there is a long break after this.
I am sitting at the airport and just reflecting back on the Fathers’ day invite that I got to little Jade’s school on Friday, she could not contain her excitement all week, telling me every day how hard they had practiced. Friday morning she woke me at 5:30 just to make sure that I knew how to get to her school. The whole way she directed me and finally we arrived. Everything was set up in a little class room and the show began.
Little recitals, group stories and individual readings to each father – it was so touching it tore at my heart strings to see and realise what it meant to these little ones that their fathers were there to listen to them. It hit me hard as I was not always there for my older kids, I now realise what just a little of your time means to then. Dammit, is work that important? Then the group of little ones began to sing, honest true celebration from their little hearts. I just could not find the words to explain, why are we not always there for them, I now know there is nothing more important. It just takes a little effort and a small sacrifice of only time. As the little voices ate into me I sat there tears streaming down my face, quietly sobbing within.
Afterwards little Jade came running up to me grabbed hold of my hand and said “Daddy when you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you crying, I now know its fine to cry we all some times feel pain in our hearts” With a little hug she said “Dad-da I love you”.