To journey alone

It’s early morning, pouring with rain as I head away from the crew down the red muddy track. Cold, sore and still hungry I move on. Another day lies ahead my only thought is how do I lift myself to push on through it. I have no one to talk to, to pass the time or just take my mind off what lies ahead. My aim is the 25km mark, just slowly grind away at it. If I can reach that half my days work is over. Then I will aim at the next little bit and slowly I will claw my self through today, that’s my target just today.

There are days that I have felt so down, I just want to stop and rest, hope that the journey will end. In the south the heat was so bad that I could not run after 10:30 in the day. It would be 3 in the morning, I would hear the clang of the crew getting the stove going for my morning tea. I have to get up, the longer I take the more the heat will punish me later. By 6:30 it is over 35 degrees and I am pouring with sweat, my throat dry and tongue, thick, my legs starting to drag from fatigue, I must keep running if I slow that heat will just slaughter me later, as happened on the 3rd day. I pushed on after 12. by 2 I was wondering around dizzy and vomiting from mild heat stroke. Somehow, I must keep going, I have never had to reach so deep in order to keep motivated to want to move on. It would be so easy just to sit down and give into the pain – No, No.

My thighs are burning, the relentless rain has just sapped my energy and the Madagascan mud driven me insane, with every step it seems to claw around my feet holding me back, trying to stop me. The mud works into your shoes and socks until each shoe weighs about a Kilogram. The fine granules of mud grind away at your skin wearing it away, eventually graze marks appear and slowly little patches begin to bleed. Drenched, all my layers soaked after 6 days of monsoon rain, shivering from cold and wind chill. There is no one out here to talk me through it, help me hide the pain. It’s just the shear will and strength of the mind that manages to keep you going, dig and dig deep in order to get through the day. It would be so easy to just go into a little hut sit down and give into the pain – No, No.

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